1. |
A Good Spy
00:53
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an altruistic conspiracy/ an affirmation of nonsense/ we are what we pretend to be/ im pretending to want to talk about kurt vonnegut/ phonic tyranny over retching vomit/ even a formless turd can form words/ sentences, paragraphs, essay-length/ apa, mla/ brain’s plasticity defines you like a hairstyle/ mostly ephemeral/ im a fine-tuned dosage of demerol/ these pills will let you live again/ puppy mills behind my eye sockets/ we quit trying, so why knock it?
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2. |
Drown (Distant)
02:43
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Vessel for depression with lessons to learn yet/ stressed the wrong syllable somewhere along the line/ didn't internalize the shame of mispronouncing an acquaintances last name/ announcing trysts to some non-existent therapist/ ashamed of being so vain until the ego perishes/ is it silent treatment or is your reception spotty/ are my only weaknesses the whims of a decrepit body?/ but what else am i but a few fucking worthless hobbies?
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3. |
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(Offsite)
no not lifeless/ im the hand stroking the wall seeking out the light-switch/ while every other inch/ of tight skin/ is devoted to making you cum a thousand times/ i need this more than anything/ but not with the lights on/ how to disappear completely/ how to list your fears concretely/ how to ignore some people and restore others/ in the same smiling breath/ bereft of intention/ abjected/ cuz I forgot how to lodge an objection
i guess capitalism hijacked my imagination/ whats left is us drowning- uncomplainin- in an ocean of bitter patience/ the idea that loneliness can be eliminated is parasitic/ fascist/ theres no art without loneliness/ now im in walmart with a phony list/ now my car starts with a groaning hiss/ and im off to the races/ theres some other shit on the itinerary that seems impolite to mention/ but the road to hell is paved
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4. |
Whistling Sand
01:55
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shits overplayed that welcome’s overstayed/ the celebrations over but im really not sober/ splitting heads over split hairs/ splitting hairs over split heads/ the argument is dead/ and this attempt to revive is morbid/ complements make me feel posthumously awarded/ blasé ceremony’s full of phoned in echo chamber type/ like two dogs conjoined at the cone collars: congratulations on the successful castration/ the silence is lacerating/ the white noise is fascinating/ im imprisoned in my wisdom/ whats the difference between a grin and a smile?/ original sin picked up second hand, take it off the shelf every once in a while/ shaking hands with brass knuckles/ not a contradiction: a complication/ growth in the wasteland/ not science fiction it’s the situation/ so im drinking malt liquor feeling like an occult witch finger pricker/ ive got a well laid plan/ I breath out whistling sand/
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5. |
Unnervous
02:25
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write raps on wet naps creativity can’t be contained/ or rather, desperation can’t be tamed/ the bloodstains that mark where I sat before I/ stepped towards fate/ will last longer than the shocked look on your face/ sully the carpet/ mind is a starship/ named icarus trying to find the truth of a dying sun/ fly so close but its too cold to roast/ no lesson about hubris to confess to my folks/ /// this is for my friends who are punished far too harshly/ and these problems are intractable/ like a dying animal/ on a conveyor belt headed to a crater in the moon/
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6. |
Avian Reduction
02:36
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live one day at a time and then die all at once/ its hard to get used to never changing/ never become disabused of clever phrasing/ alienation is knowing that time well spent is time wasted/ put our heads together and end up with big welts/ go tend to our wounds separately/ time gets old/ think about bird feathers poetically/ the quill runs the inkwell dry/ renewable resources under the falling sky/ tears spill from puffy eyes like water overflows from a careless pour/ hapless, trapped in a metaphor/ grassfed, free-range/ half-dead, pee stains/ on the toilet bowl/ is there a story behind that yellow splotch?/ pretty much, life is what gets run over by our racing thoughts/ roadkill, sloppily erased nature/ american malaise, the world drowned by a melting star-spangled glacier
the coincidence of insanity and art/ im a mannequin in your amazon shopping cart/ vanity imparts instructions we try in vain to follow/ i feel pain when i swallow, keeps me up past minerva’s owl
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7. |
Innermost Jewelry
02:04
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empathy is entropy/ bury resentful sentiments in our collective lethargy/ too immature to handle love or emerging love handles/ fill the suburban china cabinets with decorative empty urns/ that’s where we hide our emptiness: in plain sight/ fictional turban clad arabs incinerate picturesque off-white/ ideologues that clog the blogosphere/ when i feel down i use my imagination/ and my imagination uses me up/
life is something i remember more than something i live/ a bright future is one soaked in nostalgia/ love tore us apart/ indifference brings us together/ this average life span of 70some novembers/ where did this year go?/ and the past few too?/ gentle people end up alone/ selectively removed/ from the rest till they can’t pose a threat despite their copious diary entries exposing this unaddressed regret/ aimlessness manifests as an unswerving march towards death/
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8. |
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I'm howling/ up close it sounds ugly/ from far a way you may mistake it for a cry of longing/ Nietzsche writes of the pathos of distance/ the futures starving kids looking for armies to enlist in/right now its different/ despair is the future and the present's collision/ wait, no it isnt/ I had another rhyme in mind but I forgot it/
Flightless biped dragging these useless long wings/ then I hear the birds sing and remember that there are worse things/ sometimes I feel like a basket of outmoded evolutionary artifacts/ tasked with mourning the death of nature at human hands/ robocops come arrest my still beating cardiac/ drinking too much sometimes but this isn't party rap/this is hardly rap/ I wrote this on my iphone sitting on a bar stool wearing a dunce cap/ dead eyed lap dogs lapping blood out their owners skulls and not looking back/ turning back into an animal/ innocent insofar as I'm dehumanized/ the fact that I can't say this shit looking straight into your eyes makes me think it might be a pack of stupid lies/
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9. |
Slowdowner
02:20
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a long car ride where you forget about the destination/ the future becomes vacant/ the present is an eraser the past is the prose the future is the blank tablet that’s exposed/ theres nothing hiding under my nose / inside the stove/ abundance of suburban suicide methods keeps me on my toes/ oh i’ve analyzed the data and I think the fucking data is made up/ laid up in this hospital/ the staff is nice but the bureaucracy is insane/ wound’s worsening and the documents don’t say the right name/ could complain/ but sedatives would follow/ in the form of averted gazes chocolate covered raisins and the smothered screams of friends who even in life I knew better in dreams//a long car ride where you forget about the destination/ conquer zeno’s paradox through forgetfulness/ forgetfulness imperialistically destroying history/ paradoxes drawn in the sand and massaged away by the tide/ im in paradise with a pair of dice/ chance bestowed my fate with a sigh/ snake eyes peer back at me/ oh so emptily/ trying to learn to love when there’s nothing at stake/ sky/ limits change as the horizon line inches forward/ I get to chose the rate/ driving so fast spewing greenhouse gas that will deliver me to heaven’s gates
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10. |
Paralysis Chatterbox
01:28
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11. |
Night of the Weaklings
04:04
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got a picture of you in a brass locket/ stashed in my back pocket/ would rock it round my neck but hiding seems more sincere/ dying is a veneer/ sighing between sips of mountain dew/ tired with/ this green screen environment/ halo like a red ring of death/ hangs overhead/ angelic and out of commission/ in the suburbs/ insect repellants a form of religion/ im butthurt…im just really butthurt/ suns dying but I can still roast hamburgers/ I have undiagnosed aspergers/ at the last supper with tupper ware cuz i don’t fuckin care
swear off following superstitions just to come crawling back with a hollow admission of loneliness/ im foaming at the mouth like your favorite coffee drink/
not a person, just the shadow of something worse/ so many shadows converge until they seem substantial/ a feeling’s only real if its reproducible/ i’m irreducibly reducible/ a glass ceiling lies flat across this crucible
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12. |
And We Out
02:08
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13. |
A Good Spy (Reprise)
00:54
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